Man en vrouw..

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women
differ

so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars
thing.

I have never figured out why men think with their head and
women with

their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into
bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I

don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.'

I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet
dreads to

hear...

'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a
woman enough

for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you
just love me

for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went
to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend
time
with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping
at a

big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her
while she

tried on several different very expensive outfits. She
couldn't

decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them
all. She

wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said,
'Lets get

a pair for each outfit.'

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a
pair of

diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She
must

have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to
think

she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet
when she

doesn't even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's
fine, honey.' She

was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the
excitement.

Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I
think this is

all

dear, let's go to the cashier.'

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No
honey, I don't

feel like it.'

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a

baffled, 'WHAT?'

I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff
for a while.

You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man
enough for

me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me,
I

added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and
not for the

things I buy you?'

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at
least that

bitch knows I'm smarter than her.